this pregnancy..

I am sure we'll maybe you are all wondering about this little Bart Jr. that is in my belly...things are good...I am not progressing as fast as I would like but I still technically have three weeks left...I needed him to stay in there until this coming Saturday..I will finish my clinical hours for school this Saturday and I did not want to make up time with the milking bags and all...so my first test is Monday October 5th and I am scheduled to be induced on October 7th...my doctor is going out of town October 1-5 so if I am going to go into labor I am sure it will be then...the basement is coming down to the wire to be finished...I can't wait to start decorating both his and Molly's room...as far as a name...we'll I think we'll just wait and see...so if anyone is counting..that is 13 days to go before I get to pinch his squishy bum...hope all is well with whom checks my blog...

This Summer...

We have been busy this summer between Bart working a ton...school..and daily life...so we have tried to spend some family time wherever we could squeeze it in..we spent the night at Sundance and rode the ski lift...we went up American Fork Canyon and had dinner....we have been to the Zoo a couple times...we have been to Cowabunga Bay....spent the day at Bear Lake...been to Wheeler Farm...we are trying to grow our hair out...and watched a lot of The Wiggles....I am sad to see the summer go but LOVE this sneak peak of fall weather!

Dance

Can you believe that Molly is old enough to start dance? We'll your right...she's not...we have tried going for two months and she loves it..but only about half hour of it...then she comes out and wants me to hold her...the teacher has told me to keep trying but I think maybe she is just to little...we are going to try again in January but I don't want to make her do something she really doesn't want to do..I always ask her every Thursday..do you want to go to dance?...no, thank you mom....

Hold hand....

As my two week break from school came and went it seemed liked I worked a ton during the break and before class even started..started my next round of clinicals...so needless to say Bart has been mister mom...one night I made it home to put Molly to sleep and she asked me to hold hand...then threw her pillow out of her crib and said hold hand again...as I laid down I saw this little hand come through her crib..waiting for mine to grab it...we held hands until I felt hers let go and I knew she was asleep..as I lay there it made me wonder is she wanting to hold my hand because she thinks I won't be able to leave...it was such a special moment for her to share with me...as I lay on the floor I felt regret for getting pregnant...I selfishly am taking the spotlight off of my little girl to have another baby..I am so worried that she will feel forgotten or left out...Molly is our world and I am about to deliver something that is going to make it come crashing down! I as a mother never want to see her feelings hurt...or ever feel she is not as special as another...being a parent is one of the guiltest jobs ever...