Thursday, September 24, 2009
Hold hand....
As my two week break from school came and went it seemed liked I worked a ton during the break and before class even started..started my next round of clinicals...so needless to say Bart has been mister mom...one night I made it home to put Molly to sleep and she asked me to hold hand...then threw her pillow out of her crib and said hold hand again...as I laid down I saw this little hand come through her crib..waiting for mine to grab it...we held hands until I felt hers let go and I knew she was asleep..as I lay there it made me wonder is she wanting to hold my hand because she thinks I won't be able to leave...it was such a special moment for her to share with me...as I lay on the floor I felt regret for getting pregnant...I selfishly am taking the spotlight off of my little girl to have another baby..I am so worried that she will feel forgotten or left out...Molly is our world and I am about to deliver something that is going to make it come crashing down! I as a mother never want to see her feelings hurt...or ever feel she is not as special as another...being a parent is one of the guiltest jobs ever...
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5 comments:
I think being a mom is so hard. I think know matter how old she gets, you will always feel guilty about the next one coming. She will adjust and feel like the big girl.
ohhh, that made me cry a little. she will be so excited to have a baby to help with though. she will jump right into that new role of the big sister! not to say she won't have her moments :)
It's kinda sad when you think of it that way...I know I felt just like that right before I had Landon! But she will soon be treated like the big sister, which will make her feel really needed and special :)
You are too sweet! Your post made me cry, but only because I know how wonderful of a mother you are to Molly and you always will be. It is so precious when they want to snuggle or anything though:)
I love the HOLD HAND! Aspen always asks me to "tickle her face to sleep." Being a mother is the BEST! Molly will be a great big sister and you will be a great mother of two beautiful babies!
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